I Want to Scream But Make No Sound

I am very easily frustrated. So much to the point where it almost makes me sick. I'm having to deal with deadlines again, and for some reason or another, I have parents who just don't think that the deadlines apply to them. For instance, I had a deadline of this past Sunday for this big event I'm planning at the end of December. Yesterday I had everything sealed and stamped in an envelope ready to go when a mother called and said, I'm sending you my son's registrations forms....
Of course I'm such a push-over that I said OK, and opened up the my envelope so that I could change everything to fit him and another boy in. Now I Have to get a whole new check written, which at my job is a painfully long and stressful process and so for me to ask for one at the last minute almost makes me want to cry. And you know what...I still haven't gotten those new registration forms in yet. So here I am freakin' out and wanting to scream and cry at the same time, but I can't....

Had another great conversation with my cousin last night. He was scared to call because apparently he had come into Austin to hang out with some of his buddies from high school and he didn't call me to come out and didn't know how I would react to that. It really isn't a big deal or anything, kind of sweet if you think about it.
We always give each other inside scoops about the opposite sex, he gives me some little hints and I do the same for him. He and I are both pretty chicken when it comes to approaching the opposite sex and we use each other to pump ourselves up. He had wanted to talk to this girl in his class for a while and he finally got up enough guts and then asked for her email address. Her email address!! I was confused, why not ask for a telephone number. Reason: a girl is more willing to give out her e-mail address to someone she doesn't know instead of her phone number. Good point I thought. It's true, I would much rather get an email from someone I barely knew than an awkward phone call. And then he said if you really liked the guy who is asking for you email address to just go ahead and write your number on there as well...and ladies...always write your name on the piece of paper.

It's not that guys forget your name, it's because they are just as nervous and are already thinking of there next line to say while your saying your name, that they just get nervous. Cute, I thought. What an interesting little tid-bit to know.
I always get nervous about "making moves" on guys too, like after you first meet someone, I always feel like it's the guys responsibility to move things along, but sometimes they're just as nervous too. Like I met this fun guy a couple weekends ago and nothing really came of it, so I asked my cousin what I should do and he was just like: Guys are usually just as self conscious as girls are and to just go ahead and email him and if nothing happens...then nothing happens, but at least you tried. True...it doesn't make you feel any better when nothing happens though. Oh well...that's just life.

I also told him about the date I went on this weekend that was super fun. And he said I handled it pretty well...I guess not alot can happen when he's hours away. Now, I'm not saying that long distance relationships can't work, but you both have to put the effort into it, and right now I'm not so sure I have that kind of attitude to put forth. But maybe we'll see how Christmas vacation goes and if I see him again then...

To my cousin...to all my cousins, not just the one's I talk to on a regular basis...I love you all!