One of my Favorite People!!

Yes...I have favorite people, and they are all very special. They're not necessarily best friends of mine...they're just wonderful people.
Today I'll tell you about Brad H...he's definitely one of my favorites. He just always puts a smile on my face with his personality. I met Brad in the summer of 2002 at Camp Chrysalis where we were on staff together. So, even though I've only known him a few years...he's one of the top people on my list.

Brad has been living in the Domincal Republic with the Peace Corps for a little over a year know and he sends updates every now and then through another type of blog. He is a Youth Specialist which means he is in charge of forming youth sports leagues, teaching sexual health, teaching a little English, organizing literacy campagins etc... for the youth in a rural community in the Dominican Republic. But this time, I got a personal email from him. Mostly, he was just asking for money to help sponsor some kids to get some retreats set up for them. He write:

"I was writing to see if you and the youth at your church would be interested in helping out my community. Thanks to a generous donation from the NFL (specifically the Chicago Bears) we have formed a flag football team for kids ages 10-16. They have already participated in one tournament and the team is really starting to become cohesive. However, I would like to expand to focus of the group and not just concentrate on flag football but also work on leadership and character building. To do this I am organizing a series of workshops that will, hopefully, culminate with a weekend retreat to a high ropes course here in the Dominican Republic. The only problem in funding."
So if anyone would like to help out...I'm gonna help him out.

But back to why he is one of my favorite people...the way he writes just puts a smile on my face everytime.
I would like to take some snippets from his recent emails to me:

"My everything,
Hello friend! I know it has been a while since we last saw each other tromping around the fields of Camp Chrysalis, but I hope all is well for you in the bustling metropolis of Georgetown...even though I HATE YOU!"

"To my most HATED friend in the world-
I HATE you!! I hate you more than my no-milk-producing goat!! And I HATE that goat! Becky, my dear, how are you? I miss you...."

"I love you. Wait! What? No I dont! I HATE YOU!!"

" Smooch, thanks so much! You're the best. Hope everything is going well and fill me in on your life.
I hate you more than toe-socks (those things are creepy. they make your feet look like hands. Awkward!)
Brad"

Anyways...those were just from the two recent emails and I thought they were funny!

His Plan for Your Mate

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone- to have a deep soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God, to a Christian, says "No, not until you are satisfied and fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone. I love you, my child, and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me- exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning, to stop wishing and allow Me, to give you the most thrilling plan excisting- one that you can't imagine. I want you to have the BEST. Please allow me to bring it to you. Just keep watching Me-expecting the greatest thing- keep experiencing the satisfaction knowing that I AM. Keep learning and listening to the things I tell you. You must wait.

Don't be anxious. Don't worry. Don't look around at the things other have gotten or that I've given them. Don't look at the things you want. You just keep looking off and away up to me, or you'll miss what I want to show you.

And then, when you're ready, I'll surprise you with a love more wonderful than anyone would ever dream. You see, until you are ready, and the one I have for you is read. I am working even this very minute to have you both ready at the same time. Until you both are satisfied exclusively with me, and life I have prepared for you, you won't be able to experience that love that exemplifies your love with Me...and this is perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have the most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the existing unions of beauty and perfection and love that I offer you with Myself. Know that I love you utterly. I am God Almighty. Believe and abe satisfied.

Q's:
1. What does this letter from God to you say about His role, plan, and purpose for you life?
2. What would it look like, in your life, to be 100% completely satisfied with God?
3. How do you feel knowing that God is preparing your future husband or wife at this very moment?


*I was looking for a devotional to do with my high school group this Sunday while we go camping and I found this in a binder that I had from when I worked at camp and I wanted to share it with you all.

Thoroughly Predictable

Here's a secret...I love the movie "A Walk To Remember". I just think it's a great movie. Probably not likely...but still, a great movie.
I watched it on Sunday over the couple hours I wasn't at church. There's a scene in the movie where Mandy Moore and Shane West are riding the school bus back to their school after Saturday tutoring and this is one of the conversations they had:

Jamie: Please don't pretend like you know me, ok?
Landon: But I do, I do. We've had all the same classes in the same school since kindergarten. Why you're Jamie Sullivan. You sit at lunch table 7. Which isn't exactly the reject table, but is definitely in self exile territory. You have exactly one sweater. You like to look at your feet when you walk. Oh, oh, and yeah, for fun, you like to tutor on weekends and hang out with the cool kids from "Stars and Planets." Now how does that sound?
Jamie: Thoroughly predictable, nothing I haven't heard before.
Landon: You don't care what people think about you?
Jamie: No.

So now I'm just going back to my last post...it may seem that you know who I am or what I'm about...but like she says, it's just thoroughly predictable. Hah...I love it.

Also, let me give you the definition of a deadline: a date or time before which something must be done. a date or time BEFORE which something MUST be done. Now, when I see that there is a deadline I'm usually turning it in before it's actually due.
Now to me, this is a simple task. You get an assignment you get the date in which you need to give it back. Simple.
I didn't know that this doesn't apply to everyone. Silly me just thought that we all had to go by certain deadlines. But apparently this isn't true. Some people are just so powerful that deadlines don't apply to them. They can turn in anything past deadline and it's fine. How do you get this power you ask? But there are people that go to my church that just seem to think that deadlines mean: turn it in whenever it's convenient to you, so that you are not going out of your way make someone else's life easier. Maybe I just have the wrong dictionary.
So please for the sake of other people's job's and sanity, if you see that something has a deadline, try and get it turned in one time!! Please!

So Much!!

I have so much to talk about today!! Awesome I know. I'm sure you all have just been waiting to hear me say that! There's a lot to say because lots has happened since 4:00 yesterday.

First, the secretary and I just have Hours upon hours of "comp" time building up, so we decided to leave work at about 4:45. Which at first I saw as a good thing because I needed to make a stop at Pet Smart because Peanut needed some food. I ended up buying her a new house too because her little wooded one that she has now is a couple years old and just a little gross and chewed up. Fine, I don't mind buying stuff that I need.

As I was leaving I noticed that Best Buy was just across the parking lot and I was thinking to myself..."you know, I haven't bought a CD in a while and I KNOW for a fact that New Found Glory's new CD, "Coming Home" just came out today." CD's are always cheaper if you buy them on the day they come out, so it was just logical to buy it that day! I also remembered that The Early November also had a newer CD out that I hadn't purchased yet. So of course, I might as well buy it while I'm there, right? Right. Plus when I got there, I saw that the Early November CD was a 3 disk pack + a DVD...That's awesome. Three CD's + DVD for like $13.99...it doesn't get any better than that. So basically I bought like 4 CD's for under $25. That's good spending. AWESOME!! I know.
As I was checking out the high school boy ringing me up asks how I'm doing. I say: "I'm doing well, thanks. How are you doing?" "I've never heard anybody answer like that, using the word 'well'"...I told him that he's not the first person to tell me that. I got called out on saying "well" the other day also. Isn't that the correct way to use that word? I'm not an English major, but I thought I wasn't doing anything wrong. Then he says, "It's just funny to see someone your age say it that way"....my age? What the heck does that mean? I kind of laughed a little laugh and then walked out of the store. And what did I see when I walked out...more stores. I can't control myself. I proceeded to buy three shirts at another store. Then I made myself leave, because apparently I have a problem and I needed to get out of the shopping area!

So I got home and sat on my kitchen counter and put my new CD's in the CD player one at a time, and yes, I listed to every song. How many songs you ask...59. Yes, 59 songs I listened to. That's a lot of songs. But one of the disks from The Early November has 24 songs on it and none of them are over a minute and a half. So that helped.
I think I made some excellent purchases at Best Buy. I definitely recommend both of those CD's to anyone looking for new CD's to buy.

After listening to all my new songs I watched the movie "Hustle and Flow". I also recommend that movie to you all, especially if you like rap music. It was just good entertainment and an eye opener. I was interupted half way through by my cousin. But I didn't mind because I really like talking to him. He'll be 30 in December (don't tell him I told you that), so he's my "advice" guy. He tells me what guys are really thinking when they say certain things, and I tell him what girls really think when they say certain things. He really makes me feel good about decisions I make when it comes to guys and lets me know that I shouldn't feel bad about anything I decide. Kind of makes me feel alright that I'm shallow at times. He's definitely shallow at times...but come on, who's not Shallow??? You're lying if you say you're not. So we had a nice hour long talk...Good times.

So then I go to sleep. I'm such a bad sleeper. I haven't gotten a decent nights sleep for years now. It's like my back just know's when I'm going to bed. As soon as I lay down I can just start feeling it begin to throb and then I can't get comfortable and everything from my shoulders to my neck to my spine to my ribs to all over my back is just hurting. It really stinks. Yes, I've been to doctors and gotten medication and done the "excercises" prescribed to me and even got an MRI on it, but nothing seems to work. It sucks. And I complain about it...but I don't know what to do about it, so any suggestions on this subject will be appreciated!!

Of course I wake up unrested and in pain, but I have to face the day anyways...and yes it still hurts, but I guess it's just something I have to live with.

While I'm getting ready this morning, the Bobby Bones show is talking about the farthest you've ever been for a first date. Some people were calling in that they flew to Missouri and it didn't work out right away and a girl was just stranded there for a couple days by herself because the guy just wasn't that interested. That's rude of the guy. At least hang out with her while she's there! So here's my story.

First story comes all the way from Detroit, Michigan. That is 1352.65 miles away...pretty far I know. But at least it was him that flew down and not me. It was a nice 5 days together of hanging out. Of course it didn't work out, but it was a fun weekend of something different.
Second story takes me 1388.76 miles...just a little farther. Yes I flew all the way to Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin. By myself. My parents were a little freaked out, but it was a family member of a lady at church. So I wasn't too worried. I knew right away that it wasn't really something that was going to "work out" and we talked about that right away, and so the trip was great. We still had lots of fun hanging out. Plus I got to travel and I love traveling and I don't think I would have ever gone to Wisconsin for anything. So it was a good excuse to go there!
Both boys were pretty far, make that Very Far, away from home, but they were both something new and exciting. Long distance relationships are hard and you have to work at them. But I think they can be something great as long as you both put something into. I don't necessarily recommend that everyone make these long trips, but for some, it could be a great experience for you!

Then I met a boy from Florence, South Carlonina this past fall while I was in Nashville and he was pretty fun. We hung out for a night and then I flew back to Texas and he drove back home. We talked on the phone for a few months after that, but again, it wasn't a big deal. Just another state to mark off of guys...just kidding. I don't have boys in every state...or do I? Kidding again. But I do have friends from far away.

When I worked in Pennsylvania at Camp Tioga, I met a bunch of fun people. I didn't actually "date" anyone while I was there. But I did go on a date the last day before I left for Maryland. This guy was from New York, but I think he's in Massechusetts now. We still email back and forth every now and then...which is nice. Just a little catch up time.
I guess I do have friends all over the place!!! I even have friends out in California, Arizona, Kansas, Oregan...goodness, I need to start traveling more to make some visits!

The morning radio show just got my juices flowing about all the people from out of state that I don't get to see anymore...

So those are all my stories for the day...

Like and Dislike

I was inspired by another blog to think of things that I hate. So I got on the topic if words that I dislike. I really don't like the word Hate, so we're going to use "dislike".

So here it is. Words I dislike:

1. Hate
2. Panties or Panty
3. Pure
4. Discharge
5. Denied
6. Cancer
7. Douche

Words I Like:

1. Amazing
2. Delerious
3. Pumpkin
4. Skittle

Now this is a work in progress so I'm sure I will think of more words, but this is just what popped into my head at this moment.

Sometimes I Wish

Sometims I wish I could trade places with someone else. Just to be somewhere different, do something different, and be someone different. I HATE when people stereotype me and just assume they know who I am. I guess I'm just as guilty, but I feel I at least give people a chance. It really gets to me sometimes...like I have this huge label across my forehead and when people read it, they stear clear of me. It hurts, and it sucks and most of the time I can't do anything about it. I'm terrified that no one will ever see me for who I really am. The feeling comes and goes but when it hits...it's gut wrenching.

I had dinner with an old friend the other day, someone that I don't really ever "hang out" with, but he was in town, so I did. He just got married this past May and I was asking how that was going. His response..."We don't really have anything in common, but she's real cool." Nothing in Common??!! Real Cool!!! Not a "man I really love her" or "it's just great"...it was a little depressing to hear.
Why would you even consider marrying someone you have nothing in common with? To me, he's just settling. I know he's in his 30's and was probably just thinking this was the next logical step to take...but that stinks. I don't want to have to "settle" for someone. That's just sad-but at the rate I'm going-there's a possibility that it could happen. But I'm going to do my best for that not to happen.

Where to go now? Life is just very distracting right now, I have a hard time concentrating and focusing on certain tasks. I can't figure out what's distracting me-but there's something there. I don't know how to put my finger on it, I just wish I could so that I can get in to a more of a routine where I can actually "live". Wouldn't that be Awesome? I guess if I had the will power I could just switch things on and off, but I just don't have the strength. I can see myself being ridiculous, but how do I fix things without help. If I just had the strength and will power to change my attitude things would be so different....better.

Had a good talk with Lauren last night. Goodness, I miss that girl. She's the only girl I know that I'm so comfortable to tell things to. There's no judgement in her tone...just friendliness. It sucks that she's so far away...but at least we're still as close as if she was still here!

A Few More

Here's a few more songs that I thought of over the weekend that I think you all should listen to:

Mest - "Living Dead"
Sum 41 - "Motivation" and "In Too Deep"
New Found Glory - "Head on Collision" and "The Story So Far"
Blink 182 - "Please Take Me Home"
John Mayer - "Love Song for No One"
Something Corporate - "Fall"
Guster - "Rocketship"
Our Lady Peace - "Do You Like It"
Trik Turner - "Friends and Family"
Lil' Keke - "Platinum in the Ghetto" (that one's just fun!)
Sensefield - "Save Yourself"
David Gray - "Be Mine"
Aqualung - "Brighter Than Sunshine"
Better Than Ezra - "Lifetime"
Mest - "Rooftops"
Phantom Planet - "One Ray of Sunlight"
Sarah McLachlan - "Push"

I chose these songs because of the lyrics, so you would really need to listen to them!! Go ahead, they're wonderful!

LISTEN TO ME!!!

I was listening to the Bobby Bones Show this morning and I only caught a glimpse of this one segment and it was them giving off their three favorite songs...or something like that and it got me thinking about what my favorite songs are. I love listening to music, so it's hard for me to narrow down what my favorite songs are.

So I decided to share the list with you all that I came up with. These are in no way in any particular order because I love them all. I tried puting them in groups, but I couldn't do that. I know there are more songs out there, but this was just me brain-storming at work, if I were to sit down at home with lots of time...I could come up with some more songs...so here it is for now.

Becky's List of Top Songs!!:
"Ice Ice Baby" - Vanilla Ice
"Just Like Heaven" - The Cure (The Goldfinger version is awesome too)
"Hands Down" - Dashboard Confessional
"So Long, So Long" - Dashboard Confessional
"Push" - Sarah McLachlan
"I Shall Believe" - Sheryl Crow
"Always on Your Side" - Sheryl Crow
"Season" - Good Charlotte
"Faithfully" - Journey
"Jack and Diane" - John Mellencamp
"Do I Have to Say the Words" - Brian Adams
"With or Without You" - U2
"You've Lost that Lovin' Feeling" - Righteous Brothers
"Chcolate" - Snow Patrol
"I Want to Hear You Sad" - The Early November
"Mr. Jones" - Counting Crows
"Straight Up" - Paula Abdul
"Cover Girl" - New Kids on the Block
"Every Rose Has it's Thorns" - Poison
"Here I Go Again on my Own" - Whitesnake
"To Be With You"- Mr. Big
"Going Nowhere" - Oasis (and Wonderwall was awesome too)
"Killing Me Softly" - The Fugees
"Tears in Heaven" - Eric Clapton
"Walk on the Ocean" - Toad the Wet Sprocket
"Head On Collision" - New Found Glory
"Paul Revere" - Beastie Boys

Now I know there are plenty more...especially when it comes to Rap or R&B, but this is just the basic list for now. I hope you take some time to listen to some of the songs that you don't know...so that you can see why I like them!!

Sneezing

Because I don't know how to put a video up on a blog I'm sending the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3TnQ16leUE

I love this clip of Dane Cook, I've watched it a couple times and I think it's great.
Yes, it has a couple cuss words on it, but just pretend like they're not there.

But all you out there who hear "God bless you" after someone sneezes it's because ONLY God can "bless" you...no one else has the power to bless, just "The LORD".

Give Me Some Credit

I think I must keep my self confidence in a box hidden in my closet because it's never around when I need it. I have my moments of feeling inadequate when it comes to my job and to other aspects of my life. But when I take that step back...I see how much I really do have things under control.

I have been a complete wreck when it comes to this program I'm starting at work. I haven't been able to please everyone (and that drives me up the wall), I don't feel like I'm doing things right, and I just don't think I'm accomplishing anything that needs to get done.

I met with my "boss" today and he set me straight. I was looking at what I do and you know what...sometimes I just amaze myself at how well I do with what I'm given. I need to just give myself a pat on the back and tell myself that I'm doing the right thing and everything will turn out. I can't help it if parents aren't as dedicated to church as mine were and don't get their kids here. It's NOT my problem. They are the ones that will have to deal with it in the future.

My support system here just seems kind of hidden at times. It's not like when I was living at home and my parents were always telling me how well of a job I was doing, I'm not surrounded by the positive energy that I once had. Peanut shows her affection when I walk in the door, but utltimately I have to be the one that keeps me going and energized about what I do every day.
Yes I have people here that tell me I'm doing a good job, but it's not daily, it's just when they see me do something they approve of. But I'm just as guilty, I don't always go up to everyone I know and give them a pat on the back just for the heck of it. Maybe that's something I should start doing though. Just go up to people and tell them their doing a good job...we'll see...

Maybe This Year Will be Better Than The Last...

I'm going to copy a little from Lauren's post because it triggered some feelings that I've been having as well.
I took this line from "Long December" and have used it in many different ways. I had a friend that was killed from drinking and driving in High School and I put this in a card to his parents, I've also used it in just letter's to friends or in passing of aquaintances.

I can't remember all the times I tried to tell my myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass
~ Counting Crows

It's so simple, but so hard at times. We always think we're always going to have these "moments", that they'll never leave us. We (or I) don't think about the little things as they're happening. They don't even have to be these amazing moments, they could just be getting a starbucks with a friend or meeting up with a family member at a bar, or watching the stars while laying on the roof. I know I appreciate all these actions, but do I really "take it all in"? I don't know, I would like to think I do, but I just don't know.
Even with my job, I know I won't be here at this place for ever, but am I really soaking up every detail of the good times? I know I'm not, because I just alway assume there will be a next one and so I don't really think about it.

What does it take to actually think about holding on to these "moments"? What do we do with these moments in time? Webster defines a moment as: a point of time. That's all it is, is a point of time. We can't really save time or make it longer, it's just there. We need to be aware of these moments and cherish them. We should never take our time here for granted. Even little simple activities are here for us and we should appreciate them.

So when a breeze hits your face, or a friend wants a coffee, or a friend needs a ride...any little thing. Stop and breathe it in and be happy to do it because it may not always be there.

A long December and there's reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember the last thing that you said as you were leaven'
Now the days go by so fast
And it's one more day up in the canyons
And it's one more night in Hollywood
If you think that I could be forgiven...I wish you would

The smell of hospitals in winter
And the feeling that it's all a lot of oysters, but no pearls
All at once you look across a crowded room
To see the way that light attaches to a girl
And it's one more day up in the canyons
And it's one more night in Hollywood
If you think you might come to California...I think you should

Drove up to Hillside Manor sometime after two a.m.
And talked a little while about the year
I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower,
Makes you talk a little lower about the things you could not show her
And it's been a long December and there's reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember all the times I tried to tell my myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass
And it's one more day up in the canyon
And it's one more night in Hollywood

It's been so long since I've seen the ocean...I guess I should
~Counting Crows

Love to Listen

I am just so excited that there are so many great songs on the radio now. I feel like we had been going threw a dry spell for sometime, but there are just so many great new songs out there. Last night while I was driving back from San Antonio I didn't even have to put in a CD because every time I would change the radio station, a good song was on. I usually have to listen to a few CD's on that drive because nothing I like is ever on...whew...I love it. Plus today, it hasn't gotten warmer than 72 degrees (I don't know what's going on), so I drove to work and back for lunch and back to work with the window's down. I LOVE driving with the windows down. I even got a little chilly...

Spinning on that dizzy edge
I kissed her face and kissed her head
And dreamed of all the different ways I had
To make her glow
"Why are you so far away?" she said
"Why won't you ever know that I'm in love with you?
That I'm in love with you?"
~The Cure

On another note...life is good. Changes are in progress and I have things to look forward to.
I got to spend a few nights at home, which was nice because I won't get to do that for a while now. Did LOT'S of bonding with the brother's, I was even brave enough to go and talk to this guy from back hom that I've had a crush on for a while. It really wasn't anything, I just think he's pretty cute, and I never talk to him because well...I'm a chicken and he's a few years older than I am. But I sucked it up and we talked for a good 30 minutes, nothing special, but at least I can't say that I didn't do it. Hopefully that'll make me brave enough to do it again...maybe not with him, but just with guys in general. I'm trying to step out of the box.

My mom made me clean out my room at their house because she wants to do some rearranging...so I had to go through about four boxes of stuff (aka: Crap). I'm such a saver, I so much silly stuff in those boxes. But I found old pictures and back packs and year books...it was a little easier to throw some of that stuff out than I thought...so now I need to try and do that here in Georgetown, I have so much "STUFF" that I don't need and it just sits around collecting dust. Hopefully I can make myself sift through all the stuff I don't need. I think it'll just freshen things up a bit.